The engineers at London's busy Museum telephone exchange are giving the patch cords a last-minute check, and, any moment now, we should be going over to the Sylvia Peters Continuitydrome at Alexandra Palace for the results of the Group B fixtures in the Idents World Cup (guaranteed vuvuzela-free since last week). The scores on the doors, collated from votes here, on Twitter, on Facebook and on Cook'd and Bomb'd, are as follows:
Thames skyline 11 ABC triangle 2
ABC triangle 5 BBC Schools diamond 8
BBC Schools diamond 11 Ulster oscilloscope on a stick 2
Ulster oscilloscope on a stick 4 ABC triangle 9
BBC Schools diamond 4 Thames skyline 8
Ulster oscilloscope on a stick 2 Thames skyline 10
I make that 9 points for Thames, 6 points for the BBC Schools Diamond, 3 points for ABC and sod all for Ulster. As one commenter said, it may well be that Ulster wasn't fielding its best formation. Better luck in 2014, chaps. I must say that I'm surprised at the lack of love for the ABC chimes, but that's identball. So in Group B, it's a clear win for geography and geometry, and in the next stages it looks very much to me as if Thames will be playing Grampian, with the BBC Schools Diamond competing against Harlech.
This, however, is getting ahead of ourselves, and we must deal with the remaining group fixtures first. And so to Group C, which I believe to be a very strong combination of the iconic and the memorably strange. So, we're looking for scores in the following matches:
Southern star vs LWT river
LWT river vs BBC1 COW
BBC1 COW vs TSW tree of bras
TSW tree of bras vs LWT river
Southern star vs TSW tree of bras
BBC1 COW vs Southern star
While I have, in the interests of fair play, mostly kept ident clips to the bare minimum, I feel that the plucky Plymouth outsider's offering is best seen in the context of first few minutes of the station's gala opening show. Never before have leotards, blacksmithery and rapid-cut vision-mixing been combined to such devastating effect. And that's before you get to a studio full of TSW staffers in party hats being exhorted to enjoy themselves by Lennie 'TV's Mr Punchlines' Bennett. Voting on this round closes at 6pm on Thursday 17 June.
17 comments:
Southern star 1 LWT river 0
LWT river 1 BBC1 COW 0
BBC1 COW 1 TSW tree of bras 0
TSW tree of bras 1 LWT river 2
Southern star 2 TSW tree of bras 1
BBC1 COW 0 Southern star 1
The COW seems soulless in its playing style, whereas Southern Star may be old but still has class.
Southern 0 LWT 1
LWT 1 BBC 0
BBC 1 TSW 0
TSW 0 LWT 1
Southern 1 TSW 0
BBC 1 Southern 0
Southern 0 LWT 1
LWT 1 BBC1 0
BBC1 0 TSW 1
TSW 0 LWT 1
Southern 0 TSW 1
BBC1 0 Southern 1
Southern star 0-1 LWT river
LWT river 1-0 BBC1 COW
BBC1 COW 0-1 TSW tree of bras
TSW tree of bras 0-1 LWT river (ooh, that hurt)
Southern star 0-1 TSW tree of bras
BBC1 COW 1-0 Southern star
Southern 0 LWT 1
LWT 1 BBC 0
BBC 1 TSW 0
TSW 0 LWT 1
Southern 1 TSW 0
BBC 1 Southern 0
Southern star 0-1 LWT river
Although pleasantly Nick Drakesque, Southern's isn't inventive enough, nor does it inspire feelings that something really, really good is about to start. LWT have a mediaeval FANFARE! Can't you just see a slow tracking shot up a long table with silver jugs and a suckling pig to Brian Blessed in a ruff, slightly askew crown atop his kingly head, eating a massive chicken leg when you listen to that?
oh, right. Just me then.
LWT river 1-0 BBC1 COW
Hard one (madam) because the COW had that "holy fuck, that's COMPUTERS" aspect (it was 1985, kids)... but still. Fanfare. Brian Blessed.
BBC1 COW 0-1 TSW tree of bras
I'd love to give a point to the COW here for the reasons mentioned above, but because "tree of bras" makes me laugh every time I see it, and the ident itself is so utterly and unashamedly surreal, TSW gets the point. Besides, when was it ever "party night" on BBC1 in that era? It was always bloody "Wogan".
TSW tree of bras 1-0 LWT river
You had to do this, didn't you? You had to put them up against each other. Gnnnn! Bras. I know that the LWT river is supposed to be, but TSW keeps me coming back for more - and every single time, I've just got no idea whatsoever.
Southern star 0-1 TSW tree of bras
It's Nick Drake versus the Radiophonic Workshop, this one. Inventive wins over convention every time.
BBC1 COW 1-0 Southern star
because HOLY FUCK, THAT'S COMPUTERS!
Here are the votes from the Hungarian jury.
Southern star 1 LWT river 2
LWT river 2 BBC1 COW 0
BBC1 COW 0 TSW tree of bras 2
TSW tree of bras 4 LWT river 3
Southern star 1 TSW tree of bras 2
BBC1 COW 0 Southern star 2
Isn't the BBC COW called Jana Bennett these days?
I love the way "Hosted by Lennie Bennett" flashes like an INCOMING MISSILE warning.
Southern star 0-1 LWT river
LWT river 1-0 BBC1 COW
BBC1 COW 0-1 TSW tree of bras
TSW tree of bras 0-1 LWT river
Southern star 0-1 TSW tree of bras
BBC1 COW 0-1 Southern star
I'm so predictable, it's big-budget ITV winning out all the way. But TSW gets a nod for that awful jump from the animated logo to the static.
1-0 Southern star vs LWT river
1-0 LWT river vs BBC1 COW
0-1 BBC1 COW vs TSW tree of bras
1-0 TSW tree of bras vs LWT river
0-1 Southern star vs TSW tree of bras
0-1 BBC1 COW vs Southern star
3 The Station That Serves the South
2 Television Simply Wonderful
1 The Gibbs SR River
0 for the poor old COW
@Nick - yes! Maybe we should dub "Dancing With Tears In My Eyes" over the original audio!
Southern star 0 LWT river 1
LWT river 0 BBC1 COW 1
BBC1 COW 0 TSW tree of bras 1
TSW tree of bras 1 LWT river 0
Southern star 0 TSW tree of bras 1
BBC1 COW 1 Southern star 0
Southern 0 LWT 1
LWT 1 COW 0
COW 0 Tree of bras 1
Tree of bras 0 LWT 1
Southern 0 Tree of bras 1
COW 1 Southern 0
Southern star 0 LWT river 1
LWT river 0 BBC1 COW 1
BBC1 COW 1 TSW tree of bras 0
TSW tree of bras 0 LWT river 1
Southern star 0 TSW tree of bras 1
BBC1 COW 1 Southern star 0
A quality showing from the TSW cheerleaders I agree, but the fans are not the team.
Southern Star don't display enough flair for the modern game, unfortunately.
13 minutes of extra time?
Must have been a lot of incidents.
I shall let Zack have his late entry, as I was too busy in my hospital bed to care.
Thank you. I'll bring grapes next time.
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